Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because in between 6 and 7 there used to be the number § but 7 raped and murdered it.

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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Dakota Fanning

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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