Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

c======3

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

minorities

What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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