How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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i hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

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Jesus walks into a church only to be touched inappropriately.

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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How scoops of ice cream does a n*gger get? 0.

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Knock, Knock No one was home.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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