Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

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You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

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Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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Whats Yellow And Cant Swim A Bulldozer.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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A car walks into a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops