roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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Aaron Pfeifer likes men

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what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

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Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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A white man, a black man, and a Hispanic man are in car, who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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