"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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Why do black people like kool aid? Why It is a very hydrating and delicious drink

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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Bob Saget

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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