What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

want to hear a cheesy joke? ... cheddar

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

Hey! Where is my tracker?

Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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