What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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Q:What the worst lie you have ever told??!!???!?!?!?!? A: I have read and agree to the Terms and Service

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What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

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What's brown and Rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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A group of black people are arrested for murder, what do you need? A better prison.

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Why was the Chinese man so sad? He's Asian.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What did Jesus Christ say to John the Baptist? Nothing. He didn't exist.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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