What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

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What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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penis

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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whats funny about the klu klux klan? nothing is funny at all about it because they cause pain and suffering to afircan amaricans and other ethnic groups.

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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