Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

Do you know the muffin man? No

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

Where's Wally? In a children's book.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

Knock knock

how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What's worse than a mentally retarded boy screaming in your ear while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors? 2 retarded boys screaming in your ears while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors.

Dead girls can't say no.

what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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