What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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What's funny about black people? The fact that they are all in prison for not being visible at night time.

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

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knock knock There's no door

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Your mam is so fat.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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What did the mother give her family on christmas? Some gelt, dreidels, and Challah because it also happened to be Chanukah on Christmas that year

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Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

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whats similar between a eagle and a armidillo? they both can fly. apart from the armidillo.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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Q. whats worse then eating a slice of cheese? A. Finding out your mom has a penis

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off, how is he? Well you see, the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off...He's dead. I..um..he's straight up dead. I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell ya.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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