Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

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How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

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A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

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What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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honest politician

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How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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