A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi would you be interested in learning about Scientology? No

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

knock knock who's there? I'm here.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

What did the slave say to its master? Nothing meanwhile he and his family had terminal cancer and were worked without pay for 20 years before dying fro, multiple cases of AIDS and infections within thier lungs and mouths.

What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

What do you call a cat that gets pushed into the pool? Angry as hell.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Get on the boat.

did you hear the joke about the lobster and the clownfish? no.. oh.

what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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