Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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What did the retard say to the other retard.. hey timmy how was work?

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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69 is a number not a sex poshion

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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