what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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