Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Hello.

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

What did the athiest get for christmas? Well he shouldn't get anything becuase he doesn't belive in jesus.

Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

bangers and mash?

A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

A blue whale walks into a bar. The bartender says "What can I get for you?" The blue whale says "EEEEEEYYYYYYYOOOOHHHHHMMMMMMM"

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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