What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

THE GAME.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What has 4 black legs, a green back, and will kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock The doors already open

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops