What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

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A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

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Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

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why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

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Paddy Englishmen, Paddy Irishmen and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. They realise that they all share a common name and make a casual joke about it.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

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A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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I need to start studying.

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i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

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Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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