roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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gay pom...

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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What do you call a baby impaled on a stick? Lunch.

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Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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david poredos

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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