what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Soccer...

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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What happens when a building has a 13th floor ? You realize this isn't a del building and fall down 13 flights.

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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My dad

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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