A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

A frog walks into a bar and the bartender thinks he is very well evolved because frogs don't walk they hop

Helena: Can u get me a pencil? Me: Sure. Me: Mr. Brandmeyer can u give me a pencil? Mr. Brandmeyer: Why? Me: I don't know. That's what Helena said.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

What comes after 23? 24.

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

What did the priest say to the little boy? "Reading antijokes in rapid succession takes almost all humor from them."

what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

Do You Know You Have Cancer?

Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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