Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

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Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Caramel Boing.

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What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

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Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

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brittney griner

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q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

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Why did the fridge cross the road? Because Sally has no arms

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

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Roses are reds violets are blue when your parents says your beautiful they're lying to you

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

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What do you call a black person who just received a bachlors degree from Havard? A very educated human being.

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Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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Why did the young teenager cut class? To cut himself! Get it?! Its a pun!

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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