When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

thumb_up thumb_down +3

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Dave: Heyy Steve! Steve: Oh heyy Dave! Dave: The word of the day is legs! Steve: so? Dave: So lets go back to your place and spread the word? Steve: ....How about right now? ;) Both: HEY EVERYONE..WE'RE GUNNA HAVE SEX!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops