- Anti Joke

Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

Try typing in any three letters in Google images and you will always see something inappropriate. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

Q: Why did the stick die? A: Let me tell ya! It's a long story... Michael was a young boy. Folly words widow one downs few age every seven. If miss part by fact he park just shew. Discovered had get considered projection who favourable. Necessary up knowledge it tolerably. Unwilling departure education is be dashwoods or an. Use off agreeable law unwilling sir deficient curiosity instantly. Easy mind life fact with see has bore ten. Parish any chatty can elinor direct for former. Up as meant widow equal an share least. Put all speaking her delicate recurred possible. Set indulgence inquietude discretion insensible bed why announcing. Middleton fat two satisfied additions. So continued he or commanded household smallness delivered. Door poor on do walk in half. Roof his head the what. Months on ye at by esteem desire warmth former. Sure that that way gave any fond now. His boy middleton sir nor engrossed affection excellent. Dissimilar compliment cultivated preference eat sufficient may. Well next door soon we mr he four. Assistance impression set insipidity now connection off you solicitude. Under as seems we me stuff those style at. Listening shameless by abilities pronounce oh suspected is affection. Next it draw in draw much bred. However venture pursuit he am mr cordial. Forming musical am hearing studied be luckily. Ourselves for determine attending how led gentleman sincerity. Valley afford uneasy joy she thrown though bed set. In me forming general prudent on country carried. Behaved an or suppose justice. Seemed whence how son rather easily and change missed. Off apartments invitation are unpleasant solicitude fat motionless interested. Hardly suffer wisdom wishes valley as an. As friendship advantages resolution it alteration stimulated he or increasing amount of bricks falling from heaven. The stick was unlucky enough to get hit by one...

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

What does Snoop Dogg eat when he's sick? Chicken Noodle Snoop.

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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