What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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drew edminstin is a rat

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Women's Rights

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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derp

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

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How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

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tim has no humor

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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uas;ugbasrG "khVESGF;OQWAEFH;OASEHFO;SAEFUASUusa;uefSOEHFSOEHDF;oasehf;oasehf;uoashvo;uasfo'H EF;owefhoaw;sefoasjefpiwaejf MINTY FRESGH

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Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Sometimes black people kill other black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops