Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did Siri say to Cortana? Nothing. Someone has to say something in order to activate either one of the voice recognition devices.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is worse than a sharknado? A bullcano.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

thumb_up thumb_down -26

It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you break up with a guy? you kick him in the nuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

hi joshua

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did Stephen Hawking say to the prositute? nothing, because he has a disability which renders him unable to speak

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops