There was an Englishman a Welshman and a Scotsman, all of whom were nationals of the United Kingdom.

Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

Q: What's black, blue, and dead? A: My wife after our fight last night.

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I blackmailed his family with rape from Ronald mcdonald

To tell the truth... Your really an abortion that grew

What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

Pandas Everywhere!!!

What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

3021 North Broadway Avenue

I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

Q: What's funnier than Women's Rights? A: Nothing.

Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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