A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

A Mormon walks into a bar.

How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

Womens Rights. Excist in nearly every country on Earth today.

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

Gordon Brown smiles.

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

jibby jobby

Q: What's funnier than Women's Rights? A: Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...