A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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How do you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? You find someone you trust and say "an elephant has been in my refrigerator".

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Where's my tractor?

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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wommmoaooammaaa

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Stranger at door: *Knock knock* Oliver Twist: Who's there? Stranger at door: Not your parents.

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A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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Barack Obama.

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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