Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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Daniel is a fag

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

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Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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tim tebow is a grat quarterback

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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AIDS.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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