Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

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My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

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im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

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three retards, a Jew, 4 Mexicans, and an Eskimo go to the grocery store. Windex is on sale. The Jew bought artichokes.

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find the mistake in this sentence: Sadam Hussein: "hello" mistake: Sadam Hussein said hello!

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why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

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A blonde has a headache, so she goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes some Advil, she takes it, and then feels significantly better.

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What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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