Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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Winter

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff, Whats not pink and fluffy? Sexual assault.

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops