A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face" To which the horse replies by trampling him to death for making rude remarks about his face.

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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Heheheheh, Good one, you made me laugh, you just made me realize that it was indeed I that said that to you once, and now you are telling me. I know now, I am happy, not because I seek happiness, but because thinking, finding solutions, guiding myself and others, is what makes me happy. I feel like an alien, because my ideals, my solutions hopes and dreams that grow out of a result of my constant thinking, will never be in this world. Yet I also feel human now, because it could have been, humanity could have succeeded...

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two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

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hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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How do you get a tower to move? Hit it with a plane.

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What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

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What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

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poop

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

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What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

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Who invented apple? God

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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