Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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how do you starve a black man? hide his food stamps in his work boots.

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Were can you find a bag of meth?

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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how do you get a clown off a swing i dont know but dont call suzy

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. Imams do not drink alcohol so this joke has a logical flaw.

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Horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The horse unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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How many fingers do most people have? 10

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops