why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, and Chris Brown all walk into a bar. I don't know what the punchline is, but I'm pretty sure the cops are there.

What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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