Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

how long did it take the blonde to solve the rubiks cube when she knew the algorithm? Approximately 6.73 minutes.

What's funny? Women's rights.

Dwight Howard

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

What do you call a scottish drunk? a taxi

What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

Why couldn't the elephant ride the bike? Because it didn't have a thumb to ring the bell!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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