What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are blue I am schizophrenic ...and so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

thumb_up thumb_down -4

name 3 fruit begining with n a napple, a norange, and a nannana

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If you rewind Gozilla, it's about a giant lizard that helps rebuild a burnig city, and then goes back into the ocean again...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks in to a bar, He sits down and enjoys a pint.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops