Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

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Why did FiddleBob Joe chuck a stick of butter out the window? Because he wanted to see a butter fly

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How many Haitians does it take to change a lightbulb? Typically one, unless the light bulb referenced is in an inconvenient location or is over-sized / industrial grade.

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

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what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

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Why did peter fall off his bike? Because Peter is a goldfish.

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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guess what what that wasnt it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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