What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people nit make the mistakes he did

Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

i think quinn is gay? you probably don't know him but when i walked him on him shoveling a ken doll is his butt

raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

What did the slave say to its master? Nothing meanwhile he and his family had terminal cancer and were worked without pay for 20 years before dying fro, multiple cases of AIDS and infections within thier lungs and mouths.

Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

did you hear the joke about the lobster and the clownfish? no.. oh.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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