A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

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eat a hot dog

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What did the English man say to the Japanese man? Nothing, they were incapable of conversation because of the language barrier created by the fact that neither had one another's language as a part of their curriculum.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

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How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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Did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off, how is he? Well you see, the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off...He's dead. I..um..he's straight up dead. I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell ya.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

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Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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batman has diarrhea

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He simply lost grip of the cone and it fell out of his hand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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