how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

I am going to school I live in Ohio, but I'm at Germany How do I do it? I'm a blonde, nobody knows

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

what do you get when you use heroin aids.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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