Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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1: What is a gum wrapper with no gum? 2: A wrapper? 1: No.

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

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What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

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Q: What does a gay horse eat? A: Cheese

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

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We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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