A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

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Knock knock. Why are you saying that, you should actually knock the door. Oh ok.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

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what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops