Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Church.

"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

why did Sarah fall out of the swing? she had no arms. Knock knock. who's there? not Sarah.

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

What do you get when you mix Obama and Chief Keef? OBLLAMA

What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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