If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son, your mother and I once had those problems but we got through it.

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Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

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doctor: hey u ready to get home person: yea doctor: that sucks cause u have cancer

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What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

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How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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Question :how many does an episode of Power Rangers show the power rangers face answer I'm not that big with power rangers.

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What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

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Gay republicans

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So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

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A seal walks into a club.

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What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops