3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

Dave: Heyy Steve! Steve: Oh heyy Dave! Dave: The word of the day is legs! Steve: so? Dave: So lets go back to your place and spread the word? Steve: ....How about right now? ;) Both: HEY EVERYONE..WE'RE GUNNA HAVE SEX!

Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

Why was the woman blind? Because she couldn't see

Diarrhea

I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

So what have you overcome? I mean I know alot about you, but little about your personal deeper self, with that said, you telling me you are some kind of X-men when it comes to genetics?

What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? It doesn't really matter but I wouldn't actually call anything because they have very sensitive hearing and will probably panic and, being blind, might collide with a tree.

Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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