What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari ? I don't have a Ferrari in my basement.

Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

what do you call a black chef glendon

Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

What is my favorite color? How the heck should I know?

what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.

Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

Caolan and Eamon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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