A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

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A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

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Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Charlie Sheen

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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Q: What has two legs and is bloody? A: half a cat

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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A women in the kitchen.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops