What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" Of course not.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's white and black and lives in the ghetto : a panda bear

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Obama lin Baden.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man go to KFC? Ever since the economic downfall Kentucky Fried Chicken is the only remaining food dispensary in a 5 miles radius.......and hes black

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops