How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Does 2 + 2 = fish? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

justin littleton being sucessful

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A jewish man walks into a bar and then gets hit in the testicles. he now has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

3 blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The 1 blonde says they're deer tracks. The 2 blonde says they're elk tracks. The 3 blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I am blind

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

1st guy:i like anti jokes. 2nd guy:me too, they make me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock knock. Who is their? Grammar. Grammar who? Of course you don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops