a jew walks out of a furnace

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A man sees the most beautiful woman he's ever seen on the street. He takes her into a dark alley and r.apes her.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

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Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

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My three children are three big mistakes.

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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