Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

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A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

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Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

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When Chuck Norris is in a puddle, he doesnt get wet....he wears rainboots.

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your pornography to the public??? ture. pornography is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

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Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

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whats big and green, andif it falls from a tree , it can kill you? a golfcourse

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops